Bet

Ashley and I made a little bet at the beginning of the week. We put $100 down on who could go the longest without having an orgasm. Even though the bet was called off last night, I still learned a lot about our relationship, our friendship and the male libido.

Warning: The following post may contain talk of sex and exploration. Young children and parents who know me or my family are advised not to read/discuss this essay.

The past few nights have been amazing, both sexually and mentally. Ashley and I both knew that sex was not the final goal of every encounter, so we were free to just be content with the little things. I'm not sure if it was the chance of winning a bet that made the nights so steamy, or if it was just the fact that long, passionate kisses were all we were going to get, but whatever the case was, each second was sinfully divine and perfect.

I really feel like we grew together. We were both free to touch and explore without any threat of intercourse, so we allowed ourselves to take in the other with the full range of our senses. I found soft spots and curves that I never imagined Ashley had, and I stumbled upon hotspots and places that really excite her which I never would have learned otherwise. I also learned that there are places on my body (unbeknownst to me) that really get me worked up.

During the course of the week, I really wanted sex or to masturbate—sometimes. Most of the time when I got those urges, I sat and just felt the urge. I listened to what it was saying and how it effected my body, where I felt it most deeply (which wasn't the penis, surprisingly), and how I could "overcome" it. Once I had enough of the strong urges, I could usually make them go away by becoming active, cooking, or just reading.

In retrospect, this was a really great way to not only strengthen the relationship between Ashley and myself, but between my body and myself as well. If I just read every time I felt the need to masturbate, I could have plowed through the complete works of Shakespeare in a couple of months. I also learned that orgasms feel unbelievably more powerful after abstaining from self-pleasure, even if you only resist a few of the urges.